hani_backup: (Mulan - for the win!)
I made Dean's List for my final semester at college! (Term GPA at 3.489, Dean's List minimum is 3.400.)

(This reminds that I just missed making cum laude at 3.373. SADNESS.)

I've made Dan's List every semester since I changed my major Fall 2009! :D Good change, great decision. I also made Dean's List back in Fall 2007, which seems like a fluke. My term GPA prior to changing my major was 2.something. I was really not happy nor applying myself to my classes.

Concerning my change of major, I loved those psychology and IDST classes. :D And English classes I took.

It is weird, though, having two classes with your advisor during the same semester. Makes you feel guilty if you're doing badly in one class but not the other, or if you're late/missing the early morning class and you show up for the afternoon one. :P

More pics!

May. 16th, 2011 01:54 pm
hani_backup: (dancing!)
Pics )

With my diploma!

My national costume

*sigh* )
hani_backup: (dancing!)
The ceremony is to start at 11am, CST...

OHMYGOD, I can't believe it...

I talked to two of my professors when I saw them at the Interdisciplinary departmental reception earlier today.

I got an A- for Psych Disorders.

I got an A or A- for Technology and Cognition Beyond the Brain.

I got an A for my thesis!!!!


I don't know about my other two classes - seniors can only access their grades on the 20th online with the underclassmen. Unless we ask professors directly like I did. I avoided asking the other professor there, because her class (senior capstone Translating Liberal Arts) was so hard. It was the one that made me break down the most. I'm sure it dragged my overall GPA and my term GPA quite, quite down. I shoud have just stuck at the senior thesis and not done both a senior thesis and senior capstone, with three other classes and auditing another class. The other graded class is Introduction to Creative Writing. The audited class was Introduction to Cog Sci...

I need to go bring a dress to a friend (the de Riguer dress) for her to try on, then continue with this cleaning and packing up my room.

After the IDST reception, my parents went back to the hotel to sleep. They traveled 35.5 hours (the delay in transit at JFK didn't help) and arrived here after midnight today. I spent time with a friend, then back in my room for more packing, then watched the Baccalaureate. I cried several times...


Must keep laptop on for the energetic music. I'm stuck on Britney Spears's "I Wanna Go" since I got her CD eralier this week.


May. 10th, 2011 08:48 pm
hani_backup: (dancing!)
As of noon today, CST in USA, I was done with all assignments, finals, papers, presentations, projects for my undergraduate career.

Senior grades are due at noon tomorrow.

Unfortunately seniors have to wait until the 20th or so to see our grades online, just like the underclassmen.


We graduate this coming Sunday, May 15th.
hani_backup: (Stress - wake up)
May 5, Thursday
Cognitive Science Major - Final draft of thesis

May 7, Saturday
Introduction to Cognitive Science - auditing the class 

May 8, Sunday
Work study from noon to 3pm
Psych Department study break from 3 to 5pm (maybe)
Psych Disorders review session from 6 to 9pm

May 9, Monday
Translating the Liberal Arts - Presentation of 1-,3-, 5-year plan at 10am
Technology and Cognition Beyond the Brain - Paper due at 3pm hardcopy
Intro to Creative Writing - portfolio due over email

May 10, Tuesday
Psychological Disorders - fourth exam, and cumulative final at 9am
Translating the Liberal Arts - eNarrative due at noon
hani_backup: ("spoiled")
You know how sometimes you do a last-minute crap-ass job at a paper or project or presentation?

It's relieving and "awesome-wow" when you get an A back on it.

But it's also guilt-inducing because it feels like a reward for bad habits. *CRINGE*
hani_backup: ("gone")
Thursday: Day 4 (1/3b) 5mg

Friday: Day 5 (2/3b) 5mg

What happened Thursday? I don't remember... No, I was able to go to class. I had three alarms set on my phone, with different snooze times. I was able to talk in the first class, in the small group and make conversation with someone on the way to our next class. But otherwise it takes so much energiz to talk, even during the thesis meeting, and it takes so much I feel like I'm in a stupor when I'm not forced to make a conversation.

Frida was ok. Managed to make both classes and the appt during the break. Still felt brain fuzzy during everything.

Tues and Thurs I have Psych Disorders. We finished substance disorders and started eating disorders tues, finished eating disorders and started cognitive disorders Thursday. It's interesting hearing some of the professors' stories or opinions/his tactics when he practiced as a clinical psychologist.

One thing he was pretty firm on, he termed it tough love. With both substance/alcohol abuse and eating disorders he said it's imperative to get them off the drugs or get a stable eating routine established before psychological therapy addressing the underlying issues can be addressed. He said he's experience a lot of alcohol addicted patients he's treated try to justify and do lie about their drinking routine. A ditty he quoted was:

Poor me,
Poor me,
Pour me a drink.
To illustrate how people can not take responsibility for changing their behavior and even if they acknowledge they may have a problem, they don't see their behavior as something that must change.

I can only remember that from my notes. I don't know if the fuzzy mind is medication caused. I don't have self-esteem dialogue going in my mind but I don't seem to card about anything right now, and it's easier to pretend online or force myself for less than an hour. But if the medication is responsible for pushing my appetite up a little, I'm glad. Commons had Meatball Monday with normal meatballs, bbq
meatballs, turkey, chicken, tofurkey... Other nights there were DELICIOUS meat dishes like lemon chicken or bbq chicken or cod.

Usually I consider dinner a social meal, to catch up with friends since we've no classes together. But if geom't have friends around, I don't feel like eating. Ramen in my room is fine. But today I was hungry enough I was willing to go eat by myself. It's weird cause back home during the summer or high school I preferred eating alone and hated being pressured to weekend lunches and dinners with my parents. Though that could've been cause my dad doesn't let reading at the table. :-P It'd be nice when I see my psychiatrist next week to have gained some weight, since I mentioned my goal to gain some weight.

Dry month, damn it. And I can feel the drowsiness creeping up.

I'm typing from my phone in the lounge room. Say Yes to the Dress... I'm hungry for Chinese food but it's expensive to order in solo.$15 minimum to deliver. :'(

Matt is supposed to visit this weekend but is unable to. Poor laddie. I'm wearing his shirt today, the sentimental sap I am. ♥

Cannot think straight.
hani_backup: (Stress - wake up)
Worse writer's block ever.

Need to write 6 pages in 2.5 hours. Haven't even started it besides 5 sentences.

In the past, even when I've put off writing a paper because of my anxiety and procrastination and perfectionism, I've always had ideas running around.

This time, there are no gerbil ideas running around in my head.
hani_backup: (Playful)
We aren't tools.

Though I had good-natured fun Monday telling my neighboring classmates they're tools, and having them tell me I was the same.

But in the serious world, nah, we aren't tools. I don't believe in determinism.
hani_backup: (moon)
Busy, busy week

1. At least 2 pages of the Intro to Creative Writing nonfiction piece (that's going to be read out loud, GAH) Class canceled cause the professor's sick. I feel bad for her (though a little relieved for me). I hope she gets well thoroughly.
2. Leading group facilitation for Translating the Liberal Arts

1. Paper #1 for Technology and Cognition

1. Psychological Disorders exam #1
2. Articles read for senior thesis (Some of them. Continuous reading)

1. Book report for Translating the Liberal Arts
2. Reading group for Daniel Dennett's visit (Forgot I had an appointment during the reading group)
hani_backup: (Pondering)
Kyle also took this class a few years ago with the same professor. I wonder what he wrote. I remember reading one of his poems, based on sensations, and there was another poem based on a color. I think Kyle chose "white" and talked about sambuca. I wonder if the professor will stick to the same assignments...

For the first one:

Mini-memoir: Bring four copies for workship on TH.

I'm thinking of this as assignment as "memoir as a series of snapshots of short films." You don't need to worry about creating a story at this point, or about whether or not the "snapshot" fit together. Hopefully this assignment will lead you to your longer nonfiction essay: this is practice and exploration time. Your goal is to create (re/create) part of the world you grew up in, to make that world tangible to readers. How do you do that? Assignment description )

I will admit some visceral dislike to this "place you grew up in/hometown" theme/question. The Ice-Breaker exercise on the first day of class was interviewing another student. Two of the questions on the handout were "What is your hometown? How would you describe it?" >_> My simple answer was "Malaysia. Hot, humid, delicious food."

Then, the next class we had an in-class assignment of writing "what we were made of" based on our hometown and poet Linda Gregg's describing what she's "made of" of where she grew up. (As an example of writing concrete images.) Excerpt ) I know the professor told us to avoid generalizations or abstract concepts but the first thing I wrote was "I am made of uncertainty built upon..." Grand abstract concept, that, "uncertainty." I envy Linda Gregg for having such vivid memories of a home-town.

Frequent rant, I know. I don't know if a lot of people take it for granted, having a sense and feel of "home" and memories of a school and/or a residence that's more than 3 years, but sometimes I feel they do. They don't really see how lucky they are. Even as they grow older and have different homes where they live with roommates, partners, spouse, family, pets, whatever, they still have a "home" with Mom and Dad (or whatever arrangement of parents and siblings there are). I can't imagine what it feels like moving out from a house you'd lived in for 16-18 years, or living/leaving in a house that's been in your family for generations. I can't fully empathize with the feeling of that kind of broken attachment. I can definitely empathize with the hassle of packing and unpacking, and some of the missing-home/homesickness, but I imagine my magnitude and degree of missing-home is different from theirs.

I also know there are a lot of variance in people's home situations. I'm describing an "ideal" childhood home life where there was no moving, a steady physical thing as a "home" where the parents don't move after the children move out, until they're old or in assisted living, where they can go back for (family) holidays, etc.
~End rant this particular time~

We did some in-class scribbling after she gave us the assignment. I have two memories I know I want to do, but I'm a little uncertain about the third one. And which question I'm answering -- three incidents involving moving, or three settings regarding the place(s) I grew up. *shrug*

We'll see how it goes, eh?

Oh, right! Please excuse typos for the assignment. I re-typed it from the handout she gave us (instead of copying and pasting it from Moodle) and my typing skills aren't fantastic now.
hani_backup: (ZOMG)
Apparently it's not compulsory for every senior in every college/university in America to complete a thesis in order to graduate.

This came as a huge surprise to me. I read an article for one of my classes where the author pointed out that Reed College (at the time of publication) was unique in that they required every senior to write a thesis. I brought it up in class and apparently it was news only to me. Not every senior in my college has to complete a thesis. For example, in the Psychology department here, juniors/first-semester seniors have to be invited by the faculty to conduct a thesis. (Which is separate from a special projects.) I don't know what it's like in other departments in my college. Mmm, browsing the college catalog, it appears some departments require students to apply to write an honors thesis and for some, a limited number of students are picked. For some it seemed if the faculty think they qualify, they can write one, without a limit of students. It seems the Chemistry, Philosophy and Geology Departments are the only ones that requires a senior thesis/colloquium. (I know from my geology major friends that you can graduate with honors, besides having a high enough GPA and all, if you get your thesis in and defended by April.) Possibly classics and Comparative Lit Department, too.


My professor also pointed out that it also requires a lot of professors' man-hours for a thesis, too, and our college isn't big enough for that.

A wrong opinion of mine is disabused! (Through facts.) :D
hani_backup: (Mulan-Who is that girl I see?)
I will consider the next five months a success if I can attain my bachelor's degree, and do whilst crying only once a month.  Freaking out, maybe...twice a month. 

I am taking four classes, auditing a fifth, TA-ing a sixth, writing my senior thesis, have work study, volunteering at the public library. Time. Where did time go?  I wonder how the student athletes and dancers do it. Or those who are very active in clubs, plays and whatnot. 

hani_backup: (Wood Witch)
[Error: unknown template qotd]

In some countries/areas, the work week is from Sunday to Thursday.  Like Bahrain and Bangladesh.  There are also other weekends worldwide which do not include Sunday. 

Me on Saturday-Sunday weekend schedule:  Sleep in.  More so if it's cold outside.  I may take a bath if it's warm outside.  But yeah, sleep in is probably my favorite thing to do.  Of course that may lead to feverish homework-doing Sunday evening. 
hani_backup: (Stress - wake up)
Did not want to see this article pop up!

The first exam felt suspiciously easy, which makes me worry.

Now, onto Visual Perception and Art studying.


ARGH, no.

Sleeeeepy, so sleeeeeepy. (Great, now I can hear Matt's voice saying it in my head.)

But, here's something on reverspective!

*sigh* Class at 10-11:05, then exam from 1:30pm...


Nov. 17th, 2010 03:12 pm
hani_backup: (Stress - wake up)
I have a personality psych paper (draft) due tomorrow on a case study we did ourselves.  No page minimum or length, just as much as we need.

I have a Science Fiction: Past and Present paper (final) due Friday.  It's 7-8 pages and I've only had some kind of pissant notes jotted around, despite meeting with my professor twice.  (I wish I had more to show her... I feel so bad.  I basically told her I hadn't started it yet.) 

This is my chosen topic for the 2nd paper:

paper topic... )

At least I got Tuesday's paper turned in, and Friday's other paper done with a partner (second draft) is done. 

I keep distracting myself by online stuff like YouTube and articles, emails, as well as trying to find jobs THAT APPLY TO MY MAJOR so I can use OPT... 

Must get down to it.  At least I have about 2 pages down for Personality Psych, single spaced. 

Feels way better then I double space it afterwards and bam! Longer!

Man, I have a craving for chicken now...
hani_backup: (Mulan-sword)
Video of The Woman with 15 Personalities and how "tests show physiological evidence of Paula's different personalities."

It doesn't appear they allow comments on the website I found this on. Pity. I wonder about the context my personality psychology professor will discuss dissociative personality disorder when we (finally) get to personality disorders. I know it's listed under Dissociative disorders instead of Personality disorders in the DSM-IV, but I think he'll see it as important in his class. *crosses fingers*

"To hospital for gunshot wounds or eat my delicious sandwich first? Nom, nom, nom..."

Yes, a man went home to eat his lunch before he went to the hospital for his two gunshot wounds. Amazing. One was in the left leg, the other in the groin. Also, the lack of fervor about the shooter is...disturbing?

I'm sorry for junking your friendslist with entries. Still scared to go to sleep.

I love this song.
hani_backup: (Xena - white dress)
I had two exams Friday. I got one of them back today.

I went from a 76 on my second exam to a 94 on the third (or 95 if she agrees with people's reaction to an answer)! At mid-terms I had a class score of 77. >_< That's a C/C+. We have one more essay, a draft of a group paper, the final group paper, a group presentation, and small class activities/labs.

Unfortunately those almost additional 20 points came from studying that also encroached on studying for my other Friday exam (anthro). We still haven't gotten that one back; I hope we get it back Wednesday! It'd be ironic if I got a C for that exam because I got an A for the first anthro exam. Flipping inverse, yay.

I also met with my advisor after class ended. We're decided on some express classes and alternates! (The registration system is completely different from now on. It's all online and the advisor has to do it.)

Following is a long list/LJ-cut of the wanted classes and my alternates. There's also psychotherapy, but I think having psychological disorders and psychotherapy back to back is a somewhat ridiculous idea. I think psychological disorders would help me in the long run whereas psychotherapy would help me if I decided to follow a clinical psychology master's degree afterwards.

Cut for courses and descriptions )

I got back from a rather yummy dinner. Orange chicken and broccoli, rice, mandarin oranges and half a slice of rich decadent chocolate cake. Yay for not overdoing it. Because my two close female friends are out of the state, I ate alone. I was somewhat on automatic during my dinner, but I appreciate eating some filling and nutritious food after a week of sporadic and light eating. I should gain back weight I lost due to the stress. I really hope so. Matt also lost some weight because he was so busy. He worked hard on his costume for the past week or so and lots of late hours on it, besides his two jobs. Sometimes it's amazing how noticeable differences seem after not seeing each other for a while. But, man, I do dislike eating alone, though. For me, meals are a social time to catch up on the day and chit chat with friends. I can eat ramen alone in my room with a book or while watching a DVD. Alone I wouldn't eat much nutritious food though I'd snack a lot if I could. If there's a lot of food around in my room I could eat a lot of it, but if I have to make it myself, I can't feed myself healthily or that well... :'( Like the summer with my failures at cooking. YAY FOR PASTA AND SPAGHETTI SAUCE IN A JAR!

I have 13 minutes until a TA session I need to attend for my class I have an exam for tomorrow. Then I have my own TA hours for Intro to Psych. Then more studying...
hani_backup: (dancing!)
One was a draft for a psych class, that wasn't graded.  I got a mixture of good and bad comments on it (bad meaning I wasn't clear or I had done something incorrectly).  I should see the professor Tuesday morning in order to talk more about interpreting the results from SPSS.  I thought we were going to look only at results of .05 level, instead of also 0.01, but I think that's incorrect.  I may also have written the results for correlations wrongly, in APA format.

Then, switching to MLA format, I got back my first paper for my Science Fiction: Past and Present class back!  :-D  The only English/writing courses I've taken was English 190 (Borders & Bridging) Fall 2007 - ENG 190 is the lowest level English course and a prerequisite for other courses, just like Intro to Psych or Intro to Philosophy is for Psych and Philo courses - and Writing 100 (Our Animal Selves) Fall 2009.  Science Fiction: Past and Present is a 271 Theory-Designated Topics course and when we first introduced ourselves and our majors and why we wanted to take the course, I was quite intimidated by other people.  A lot of them are seniors or juniors who are creative writing majors or English majors (or double majors for some of them), or Journalism minor, etc.  As the semester went on, I grew further intimidated because a lot of them had really insightful stuff to say, using the several theories of science fiction genre we've read and applying it to the short stories/books we've read, or just the more abstract and conceptual aspects of the books.  I feel like my few points in class are more specific plot-oriented or characterization, and I'm still having a hard time looking "beneath" that surface, and seeing the book as a whole and connecting incidents, themes, motifs (that are not knock-on-your-head obvious) from various parts of the book together. 

We finally got our papers back in the mailbox today. (We handed them in October 1 and we expected to get them back on Monday, after Fall Break.)  I was pretty anxious about getting them back and checked my mailbox 3 times today before it was finally there!  My professor wrote her comments on the last page, folded our papers in half, stapled it shut and wrote our names and box numbers on the outside.  Man, I had a hard time resisting ripping the paper trying to get the staples off!  (This was a 6 page page.)  Anyway, I made several errors (wrong words, using past instead of present tense for fiction works, some mistakes in grammar -- grammar is the hardest part of any language for me), but most of her comments were encouraging, or rhetorical questions about some points, usually about a possible alternative interpretation, or taking it further.  I wish she could have seen the full outline I had, because I had a lot more to write, but 6-7 pages didn't fit it all!  I had to cut the third beauty that, ironically, would have answered a question my professor posed in her end comments. 

I got an A!!!  A full-blown A!!! Not an A-!  I had this professor previously for my Writing 100 class, and I got an A- for that class and both essays and the presentation, so it really feels good to take a high-level English course and get an A on the first paper.  It definitely helped to have written out an outline and a quarter-fleshed out essay to bring to the Writing Center beforehand.  (And this kind of takes the sting outta getting a bad grade for the exam the same day the paper was due, since I put forth more time writing the paper than studying for the exam...) 



hani_backup: (Default)

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